26 December, 2011

Name Brand Purses and women


I avoid approaching women carrying name brand purses. Let me rephrase, if at all possible, I avoid approaching women carrying name brand purses. This means if I see two equally attractive women or even if one woman is more attractive than the other but one is holding a name brand purse and the other is not, I will approach the purse-less woman.
While I know a number of women are already offended, this is not an attack on women who like name brand purses. I don’t know you like that. I feel like my preference is no different than women who prefer taller men. There is nothing wrong with short men (I think) you just prefer to date taller men. The whole point of having preferences is to discriminate based on what are often superficial attributes that over the years you have grown to prefer or learned to avoid. Such is life. Contrary to your kids’ summer sports leagues where everyone gets a trophy, in real life, we can’t all be winners.
Due to a couple personal experiences in my lifetime, I am a little bit  more money conscious than the average man. It’s not that I can’t afford nice things, I can. I make what I would describe as decent money. I’m not rich. I’m not poor. I, however, have learned to know my limitations when it comes to the women I date.
Back in the day,  I know of a friend  who was often the best-dressed guy in the club. Unfortunately, he was often the brokest guy in the club, too. he  looked good as hell but if you wanted him to buy you a drink – which he didn’t do anyway but let’s say he did – you would have been s*** out of luck. he was living check to check, yet he was always able to find enough money to get into the club with a brand new outfit. His priorities were messed up and he wasn’t alone; so were those of the women he dated. Too often, the two were more concerned with looking like we had money than actually accumulating money. We felt overwhelmingly compelled to look rich instead of trying to be rich. Technically, there is nothing wrong with this life style.
But, it is not the life for me
I still spend my money on frivolous items from time to time but I am a lot more financially aware than then. I am also far more concerned with reality rather than perception. I prefer to have money than look like I have money.
As such, I have grown to avoid the name brand purse carrying women of the world. In my experience, a good percentage of these women are more concerned with living the lifestyle of my former perspective than my current. There is no judgment on my part. If you like it and it makes you happy, I love it. More power to you. However, you are likely not the woman for me. I know this is superficial, stereotypical even, but it is what it is so I have no plans to apologize.
As a side note: I judge the woman’s purse because I can generally tell if a purse at least looks expensive. I know nothing about women’s shoes and clothes – they all look the same to me. I know I’m not always going to approach a woman with a purse and even if I do or do not it doesn’t tell me how materialistic or high maintenance she is or is not but it does help narrow down the field. If I miss out on a perfectly good woman because of this standard that will just have to be the way the cards fall.
Like most men, I prefer my life to be as simple and stress free as possible sans the occasional crazy girl that I will date from time to time to spice things up. Therefore, if I can, I will avoid the woman who would rather spend all our money buying out the mall in lieu of paying our bills. So yes, if you would rather spend my/our money on a $500+ purse or shoes or both, when you have credit, school loan, or general debt outstanding, you are likely not the woman for me. This is simply a lesson I have learned over the years, no more, no less. Finding a woman who is more financially aligned with my thinking is simply easier to get along with on a day-to-day basis. This is not to say I could not be with a woman who prefers to purchase the finer things in life rather than maintain a savings account for unforeseen expenses but if it’s up to me, avoid her I will.
Of course, I recognize that to a degree I can’t help who I fall in Love with. If I fall in Love with a name brand obsessed woman, then so be it. I will adjust accordingly. I am actually of the mindset that as long as the bills are paid, my woman can do whatever the hell she wants with the rest of the money (disposable income). This is a true story. You can ask any woman that has seriously dated me. Even when I was broke as hell, what was mine was hers and what was hers was hers.
The main difference between now and young me  is that beforehand I would live outside of my means to make a woman I was with happy; whereas presently, if you are not happy with the money I make you have three options: 1) Get over it. 2) Get a job. 3) Get another man.
For all my hard work, I would prefer to have money in the bank than a brand name purse draped on your arm. I will even go further to say I don’t expect my girlfriend/wife to work as long as she doesn’t expect me to slave day and night to satisfy her wants when her needs are already sufficiently addressed.

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